Oh Fernando...

After getting married, a woman goes through all sorts of adventures for all of the different requirements to change her name. She has to wait in lines at the government offices and thinks that is a huge pain in the rear, UNTIL…

Try changing the name on your bank account. No, not your credit cards, those are easy, just takes a quick phone call. Your honest to goodness checking, savings, bank account.

Banker: Hello ma’am, how may I assist you today?
Me: I just got married and need to change the last name on my account. Here is a copy of my marriage license.
Banker: Have you changed your social security card and driver’s license?
Me: Yes, just this week. Here is a copy of the receipts with my new name clearly printed on them.
Banker: I’m sorry ma’am, but we have to have the ACTUAL cards with your new information on them before we can accept them.
Me: Well, I had to show them my marriage license to get these changed in the first place so why do I even need the others to prove my name has been changed? Shouldn’t my marriage license be enough?
Banker: You would think so, wouldn’t you, but sadly no. You have to have the actual cards before I can change the name. Is there anything else I can help you with today?
Me (through gritted teeth): Nope, I think I had better leave now.

I mumbled and cussed under my breath all of the way to the car.

Weeks later armed with the ACTUAL driver’s license and social security cards with my new name clearly printed on them I go back to the bank.

Banker: Hello ma’am, how may I assist you today?
Me: I need to change the last name on my account.
Banker: Is this due to a marriage or a divorce?
Me: Which is easier?
Banker: Umm…?
Me: I’m just kidding, due to a marriage.
Banker: Congratulations on your marriage. Do you have your marriage license with you?
Me: No, but I have my new driver’s license and social security cards with my new name on them.
Banker: I’m sorry, but I can’t change the account unless I have the marriage license.
Me: You are kidding, right?
Banker: No, why?

So I explain to him what I had been told the first time and that I had to have the marriage license to get my new driver’s license and social security card in the first place, etc… He was apologetic but said he couldn’t do anything without the marriage license. I think he could tell that he was about to end up in a body bag in my trunk because he lowered his voice.

Banker: I’m not supposed to do this, but I will make a copy of your cards and if you can e-mail me a copy of your marriage license tomorrow, I will change the account.
Me: Really?
Banker: It is the least I can do.

Whew! Fernando lived up to his promise and my account is finally changed. My credit card on the other hand required a 2 minute phone call…have a nice day!!